Walking away from a relationship is never easy. The temptation is always to wait another couple of months and see if he would stop being a leech or if she would stop cheating on you. But too often and too late, a player is always a player, cheaters rarely stop. As you will soon discover, a leech is a leech. If you have invested in the wrong company, it is better to disinvest and move on to more profitable things. Resisting may seem courageous and long-suffering. But please, do you have to suffer in a relationship that is going nowhere? Let go, dear. Walk.
Never forget that you can’t force anyone to love you. If you need to beg him to stay with you, what you feel is not love and it’s time to let go. A man you blackmail into not leaving you or who you are thinking of trapping with a pregnancy, real or fake, is not your man. Even if it remains, it is only there in the body and not in the spirit.
Even if it seems like it, the end of a relationship is not the end of life. Not all relationships have a happy ending. Love sometimes leaves you.
That doesn’t mean you’re cursed or unlucky. Just learn the lesson and move on. The right person will come. It may take a little time, but it’s always worth waiting for the right person. As the saying goes, you have to kiss a few frogs before your Prince Charming arrives.
If you’re in a relationship where you constantly have to sacrifice your happiness to please your partner, you’re not doing a good thing. You have to pretend to be a teacher because his mother doesn’t want him to marry a lawyer. You have to pretend you don’t have a doctorate because his ego is fragile and he’s thin-skinned. You have to pretend that your brand new car is “tokunbo” because it would make him “feel some kind of way.” You’re in the wrong place. You may handle him now, but in a few years you will resent him and what he has turned you into.
A woman who demands but provides no value to your life is only good for a short trip. If you let a girl make more withdrawals than deposits in your life, you will find yourself out of balance and in the red before you know it. You need to know when to close the account and take stock. It is always better to be alone with dignity than in a relationship that constantly requires you to sacrifice happiness and self-respect.
Does your relationship give you more pain than joy? Are you wondering more about why you’re there than wishing you had met your partner sooner? Don’t be so blinded by past happy moments that you forget all the unhappiness they bring you. If your relationship leaves you frustrated, upset, miserable, unhappy more often than not; if it leaves you in tears every now and then, perhaps this might not be the right person for you. The relationship you are in now should be the one that brings you happiness now. It’s quite simple, in business the aim and objective is to make profit.
In a relationship, it is happiness and has no substitute. Any type of abuse, physical or verbal, is absolutely prohibited. If he hits you, slaps you, punches you to make his point, it’s time to let him go. Forget about the beautiful gifts and nice words he says afterwards, there is clearly something wrong with him and also with you for staying there for so long. If your way of expressing anger is to throw the intercom at the flat screen television, please start walking and keep walking. What those crazy moments show is something profound that needs to be addressed. Perception is reality. Emotional abuse is more complicated because only the victim feels it. You’ve told yourself long enough that things will get better. It’s not like that. He won’t. The time to leave is now.
She believes in God. She believes in science. The two are not going in the same direction, so getting on the same train will be a mistake. For any friendship or relationship to work, the parties involved must share some core beliefs and values. The values you share are the great rocks that will keep your relationship strong and help you weather even the toughest storms. Of course you know there are storms coming. Not you?
On the other hand, if your core values are fundamentally different, love or no love, when the storm comes, holding your union together will be like running uphill or trying to hold the ground together in a mudslide.
Are you both growing or is this relationship holding one of you back? In fact, if you are true to yourself, this relationship will have changed your plan and desire for your life. You have God’s calling on your life. You know you have special gifts for pastoral work, but she has issued an ultimatum: the day you become a pastor will be the day she leaves you. So you stay there hoping that she will change her mind, praying on seven prayer mountains for God to change her. Brother, you are not married yet. If she represents God’s will for your life, why does she oppose God’s will in your life?
Sisi, you know that your ultimate ambition is to become the first female Senior Lawyer of Nigeria (SAN) in your village, but the man in your life has made it clear that no wife willingly “answers sir” to any man because he earns enough to take care of his family. He told you that his woman won’t go to work and that’s why you are learning to make cakes. Take a step back and look at the road ahead. Are you where you want to be and do you see a future where you will be happy baking cakes? If the only reason you’re doing what you’re doing is to make him happy and hold him back, then you need to think again. He’s mean and violent. He is lazy and unambitious. But he proposed to me and his beautiful ring is on your wounded finger. So you decide to wait expecting a better future. Wake up girl. You don’t live in the past, you don’t live in the future. Are you happy now? You have to arrive tomorrow. It’s okay to hope for better days to come, but not in this situation. Take a look at what you have, at him. If that’s what it is, why do you think a wedding ceremony will change that?
In short, when you give yourself to someone who doesn’t add value to you, you give away pieces of your soul that you will never get back.
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